Facebook Netiquette

Was readin a mag about men using Facebook. Its a interesting read i must say..


Its call Facebook Netiquette.


Wasting your time fishing for friends? Get with out programme

1. First off, Don't Join Facebook - Its like mobile phone psychosis but a thousand times worse. By the time you read this, more than million Londoners will have signed up, making it the biggest city on Facebook. Be a man, not a statistic..



2. Don't Go Looking For Friends. Let them Come to you - You ignored Point 1 ? OK, Just remeber, this isn't the first day at big school. Your Facebook "Friends" do not define you.



3. No Silly Photos - Unless you're seriously vain, do not upload a profile picture that (you think) makes you look chiselled / deep-thinking / buff / sensitive / desirable. By the same token, don't upload a photo of you smoking a huge joint ( thats funny i think). pulling a "whacky" face or getting jiggy with a buttered hoover; someone, very probably your boss, will conclude you're a stoner, a plum or a sexual devian't. A comedy headshot of Marty Feldman is, however, acceptable.


4. Ten Photos are quite enough - Exceed a reasonable number and you'll start lookin more enthusiastic than kriss Akabusi on happy pills - and no one really wants that.


5. No privates on parade - Don't display your address, telephone number, date of birth and updates on wether you're at home or not. Would you hang a banner from you top-floor windows at home advertising to burglars the facet you're on holiday?


6. We're not interested in what bands you're into - Or what your favourite films are. Or books. This is not the online equivalent of marching to school proudly swinging a Puma holdall with Suzi Quatro, Blondie and XTC daubed on the side in Tipp-Ex. Nobody is goin to make friends with u on the basis if your passion for The Polyphonic Spree or because you think Uncle Buck is a cinematic tour de force.


7. Have no heart - Do not tell the world wether you're in a relationship, even if this means your girlfriend freaks out when she looks at your page. A big pink heart next to your name makes you look like a committee member of the My Little Pony Fan Club. One word of warning, however: do not remove the heart if you have already made the mistake of putting it up. Your friends will think you've just split up qand inundate you with messages of condolence or, if you work in the same office, sympathetic frowns. You'll also run the risk of being hit with a frying pan when you get home.


8. Maintain the status quo - We are not remotely interested in whether you're missing your kids, bent on killing members of the Big Brother house or grappling with morbid constipation. If we want to know how you are or what you're doin, we'll ask. By fax


9. Embrace rejecting people - If you're comfortable with your choices in living, breathing relationships why, in cyberspace, shouldn;t you be able to choose who your friends are? Those you reject will likely be the ones who solely interested in amassing as many friends as possible.


10. End it all - If it all goes horribly wrong ( Swamped by ex-girlfriends and university dicks you've spent the last few years trying to escape ), there's always the option of committing facebook suicide. With a few depressions of the delete button you can stop worrying about everyone knowing everything about you and reclaim your independence and individuality. More importantly, you will be granted a passport to return to the real world, where your real friends live..

Well guess i m not a cool person at all according to this..i have fail every point (nearly every point , i don;t have a pink heart.) but i must say i enjoy readin that very much.